Thursday, September 2, 2010

Dude, I've Been Had Again! Quiznos Caloric Intake Ruins My Healthy Eating!

So I generally try to eat healthy food. I don't always, but I think I do pretty damn well. One of my mainstays when I'm going to a sandwich shop is to eat tuna. Ham or Tuna - because I tend to think they're healthy options. I know Turkey is too, but the only time I really like Turkey is during Thanksgiving dinner or when I want to have a tasteless sandwich after a mean night of drinking. It just doesn't do it for me unless it's lathered up with gravy, stuffing, and mashed potatoes. Mmm....

Let me explain a bit more why I think tuna is healthy. Because when I eat it at home, I usually put a can or maybe a can and a half on my sandwich. A can of the solid white albacore, has maybe 70 calories and a gram of fat. Toss in some light mayo and you got yourself a healthy sandwich - and it tastes great too (especially with some pickles, lettuce, and tomato). Forget the mercury - I figure it's not going to kill me... especially because nobody can decide if it's really that bad for you (here).

So with my endless amounts of wisdom, I made the determination that there's no way a restaurant, even a valueless amoral fast food restaurant (which apparently Quizno's is), could damage tuna's reputation so much as to make it unhealthy. I totally get that making burgers is unhealthy - I mean, look at the base: grade D ground beef. But tuna?

So imagine my shock when my world came crashing down last week. A Men's Health article listed the worst meals in the country. Worst sandwich? My beloved tuna, server up by Quiznos - with a healthy side of Cheetohs (shown here). Leave out the Cheetos and it's still got 101 grams of fat. ONE HUNDRED AND ONE! Are you kidding me? And 1500 calories. That explains my strangely high cholesterol. And that also explains why Quizno's is now out of my life. I feel like smackin' that damn talking toaster upside the head!

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